Scattered Thoughts

You know when you overhear a snippet of a conversation at just the right moment to completely confuse you or make you laugh?

Well, I collect these scattered thoughts. So here are some I've heard lately...some of them are funny, some of them you might have had to be there.

Here are some I heard around campus...good old BYU.

"...I mean, if there was no Facebook, she probably wouldn't have married Harry..."
(Oh, now this is scary. Now we're dating and marrying people because of Facebook? Maybe I should deactivate my account. On the other hand, I could use this to my advantage."

A person, "Well, she's not completely desperate. Other person in a tone of complete gravity, "I think she is."
(Is she desperate? Or is she not? Stay tuned.)

Conversation between two girls about a boy, "He'll try to kiss you and make it official someway. He's just a nervous person and he doesn't know what he's doing...I talked to him and I think he really does like you."
(Oh girls...sometimes I wonder why we listen to each other. Girls can get other girls in relationship trouble sooooo fast and create expectations that cause emotional trauma. Yes, trauma.)

Two guys, "So are you dating anyone?" Response, "No...well, kinda."
(I'd like to hear the other side of this one...I can hear the girl now, "I'm so excited to be dating him! He just seems really committed and I really feel like it's going somewhere.")

Heard outside the library, "The weather is so schizophrenic today."
(Note: Schizophrenic is when you see people that aren't there...um? I don't know if you can give the weather that personification. Doesn't quite work.)

Phone conversation, "He said that girls weren't smart here, but he didn't want to date any of the smart ones because they weren't attractive, but all the ones he is attracted to aren't smart...he's looking for substance girls, and what better place to find them. I mean, he's not going to find any in the party rooms at TU."
("Substance girls"...meaning having substance and not taking substance, I presume.)

A guy on his phone, "You've never had chicken alfredo? That's weird. Um...can you cook? It's not too difficult."
(And then he preceded to discuss what the other person had eaten in the last week. Um...okay.)

Girl in the hall, "Stacy's in the back baby-making." Boy, "Yeah, I heard the ruckus earlier." Girl, "Yeah, I decided to go be productive myself. Baby making."
(This conversation obviously applied to some situation that only made sense to the two of them. All I can say is, I don't think I'd say that too loudly down a hall where dozens of people can hear me.)

Two more from classes...

A professor commented on High School Musical saying, "There are some elements that give it some more depth...the characters aren't as square."
(I'm sorry, but the characters in High School Musical are about as square as they come. Okay, well I guess we could say that Troy sings and plays basketball...but is that really depth?)

From a movie about American influence on Japanese culture, "It was a Japanese person's worst nightmare--to be alone in a room full of unpredictable, aggressive Americans."
(No comment. It was just hilarious to me.)

So next time you overhear something funny...write it down. And share it with me.